When He Called Me

As soon as I stepped inside, I knew I should have been frequenting it more often.

Last Sunday, I woke up, took a bath and headed for church. Sounds like the usual stuff any one would do on a Sunday but I must confess, I haven't been regularly attending church these past few months. I know, it is something to be ashamed of, and I am really ashamed of it. I don't even have any excuse for it - I was simply lazy, and probably, proud - not admitting that I have not been showing my God my love enough. Truly shameful indeed. I could take the time to get dressed and meet up with friends, watch a movie and extend a lot of favors to others but the very thing that I should be on top of my list, I neglect, I ignore, I take for granted. I am writing about this now because I've realized that I should come clean about it, in the hope that my public repentance would elicit more support.


I was even more ashamed when the mass started with the singing of the opening hymn. Behind me was a young man who was visibly delayed or has stagnated in mental development. He was singing his heart out, singing his praise, full of joy and gratitute for being able to participate in worshiping God. My tears fell, and they fell out of shame, out of repentance, and yes, out of gratitude. I was shamed because because here is someone, another one of God's child, who is not commonly perceived by others as blessed, can show that much love towards God. I became repentant after realizing that I have so many things to be grateful for, and yet, I happily go on with my life neglecting to express how much I love my God. Because I love my God, but these days, I've placed my love for self above him. It is not enough that I love others fervently, consistently. Above everyone else, no one deserves my love more than Him. I pray. Sometimes I pray a lot. I pray for others. I pray with gratitude. I pray with hope. I pray with trust. Sometimes, I feed on his word though I wish I was nourishing my soul with his word more. Still, nothing compares to worshiping with fellow believers. Their faith is infectious, it infuses me with strength and strenthens my trust in Him. If I love God, I will not want to be away from him. I will always want to be near him. To be near him, however, we need to be strong in our faith and to be strong in our faith, we need others.

The homily was about humility, and indeed, I needed to be reminded of it. Nothing that I have now is of my own doing; they are all blessings from God. As they are all from Him, they gave them to me so I will be able to do what he intends me to do, my purpose in this world, my purpose at this very moment.

God must really love me. He called me last Sunday, invited me to his house, and I went. I'm just so glad I did.

Have a blessed day to all.